4 Words...

There it was the message that had a thousand eyes. The message that made my heart beat faster and my head pounded. I started getting dizzy, lightheaded, but that was maybe from not having breakfast. The walls are closing in, the clothes you decided to put on were too tight.

“We need to talk.”

Depending on who this is coming from, a lover, a friend or family member, the way we react can be drastic. I got this message this morning, from the club president, and instantly I thought of everything I did wrong. Which was a lot, now that I sit back and think about it. It can mean many things, from talking about the day, the relationship you are somehow fucking up or something bad was happened.

Turns out a member of the club dropped out, felt the club advisor role was too much to handle. His girlfriend just had a baby and he was too busy taking care of them to focus on school. I found out later that he dropped out of school. The president and I would split his roles down the middle, which means added work to myself.

I was already creating posters, adding new members and finding most of the information worth sharing. I would have to take down everyone’s name, what their dream goal is and how they plan to get it. I don’t really know why we need that…

Four words. Four simple words and yet we are terrified by them. Afraid of what will come after those four words. Afraid of what those four words will do to our lifestyle, our relationships, both personal and intimate, or us. Why? Should we be afraid if we already know the outcome?

Though I didn’t know the exact situation, I knew that someone either quit or we were being promoted. Finally being able to have campus meetings would is still a dream to us. But, if need be, well choose another club advisor out of the hundred people who joined our little club and everything will be fabulous.

Oh, remember Trixie? The diapered dog that my classmate took in? He gave her up for adoption last night. Said, “She was shitting all over the place. I even stepped in it.”