GayBoys: Vol 2

My twitter followers before the homo whisperer: 230.

My twitter followers after the homo whisperer: 339.

I had to take a look at what was going on. I wondered, “Could that many people read my stuff and like it? If so, how did they find me? Should I be worried? Why isn't anyone falling in love with me yet?!?! 

I looked through the last fifty or so and found that many of them are fellow writers, with a couple of publications under their belt. But many of them are, ladies and gentlemen brace yourselves, HOMOSEXUALS.

I looked through their pictures, read a few tweets and honestly I was quite shocked. And that coming from me is almost unheard of. They were all skinny, blonde and quite opinioned on every matter from new songs or fashion to world affairs. I wondered, “Has the closet made us angrier? Or better?

As I looked at the pictures, mind you with their shirts off and, in some cases pants, I couldn’t help but say out loud, “I could break these guys in half.”

I also wondered about myself. Could I be in a relationship with these guys? Can I be in a relationship with someone who is a clean freak? Skinny? Someone who likes to party and is the blondest of blondes?

I take a look around my apartment. Without my roommate the place is slowly going to shit. The kitchen sink is full, I haven’t taken the trash out and literally, I sit here as I type this, drinking out of a mountain dew bottle. Who uses cups anyway?

Lets not get started on the tweets. I read through a few and they basically screamed, “HAVE SEX WITH ME.” I’m telling you this right now; if I see one tweet asking or looking for sex you will not be following Joe Russo. I am not about that lifestyle. Not without dinner first, honey. 

There is one though, and his tweets are fabulous. He mixes sex and humor but also a little bit sadness, quite like my life. Single Gay life, if you haven’t, follow him.

Guess what, I just reached 340. Hope that doesn’t make me sound cocky.