Old Friends

This afternoon I had dinner with an old friend; my high school prom date. We met at the mall to showcase our newly rekindled relationship. We were always together in high school, always laughing and having fun, and always had each other’s backbone. Then we all went off, or away, to college and everything went downhill. The typical everyday text message turned into a weekly text message that turned into a monthly text message. Then no text messages.

We met at the mall, like I said, to showcase our rekindled relationship but it actually showed that nothing has changed between us. We were still angry at the same things, I’ll get to those in a few, and we were still “Hella cute.” We were also extremely sexually frustrated and at one point I told her, “That my frustration is seeping out of me like pee. I’m like Jean Grey from X-Men, I turn into the Phoenix and everyone gets disintegrated.” We walked the mall for a bit, I had to spray my perfume on me, gossiped and sipped on our discounted Starbucks frappicinos.

“You know who finally came out?”

“Please don’t remind me. He has got to be one of the worst things to happen to the gay community. His hair looks like the Wendy’s girl but split down. Like Jesus and the red sea, just split right down the middle,” I tell her.

We got on the conversation about gays, shocking, after she told me her co-worker has a fiancé. “But he’s not like a typical gay, you know, like he’s different,” she tells me.

I start to laugh because I feel that there are two forms of gay and we all know the second form. You know the gay guy that just looks sticky. He wears his sex episodes like a scarf. I have a friend like this and he posted a photo a while ago and my fingers got stuck to the keyboard. YES, they did.

“You know what else I hate?” she asks right before we get seated at Perkins.

“What?”

“Sororities.”

“Yes! I hate them too. Rush Thi Omega O. Rush Delta Alpha Pi. And every one of those bitches are skinny! Their main question is, “Does this dick make me look fat?”

The main point is that we stayed ourselves. We didn’t let the bad things (horrible breakups, dropping out of college or moving back home) hurt us. If only we could get everyone back just like in high school.